School Days.

He kissed me this morning. Leaned from the backseat of the white Honda, lips pooched out and toward my cheek. While he was doing this, I became fixated on the vision of his knees pressing into the back of the seat though I could see that his lower body remained firmly on the seat. He seemed six foot tall. As quickly as the kiss came on, he pulled away, leaning his back to the seat again before gathering his lunchbox. Not the black one with insulation and the strap of perfect length. No, on this morning he had a bag used for groceries that bruised his apples and turned watermelon to juice. We don’t know what happened to that other lunchbox. . .

Just as the fourth grade safety patrol kid opened Turner’s door, I took notice of the two inches of sock poking out from under the dark blackness of his jeans. How could those jeans, the newest in the bunch, be too short?

"Have a good day dude," I call out to the door as it closes. I’m slow this morning, overcome by the not-new realization of how much I miss everyday. He waves from the sidewalk. Cars sit behind me and in front of me, waiting to proceed out of line. Turner encounters a friend, and he places his hand briefly on his shoulder and for a brief second I see this man that Turner is becoming, and I’m so grateful for the gentleness.

“Brother.” Mabel says from the backseat. I roll down the window. The white Element in front of me moves on. “Brother!” She shouts louder as we drive away. Brother throws a hand up in her direction. As we are almost home, a ride we take in silence this morning because I'm so lost in my thoughts, Mabel says in her softest voice, “Brother school.”

"Yes Mabel. Brother is at school. It's a school day for Mabel too." And then I sing her the song, the very one Turner helped me to make up that first day we visited his new preschool in Tucson. At the park across the street from Catalina, Turner and I brainstormed lyrics and Mabel seems equally pleased by the tune (set to "School's Out for Summer"): "It's a school day for Mabel. It's a schoooool day for Mabel. She can run and jump and read and write and tell her teachers thank you at night. It's a school day for Mabel."